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Terrain Collective Inc
2625 28th St. #110
Boulder, CO 80301

303.953.8620
we@pockitudes.com


P.O. Box 19551

Asheville, NC 28815-1551
USA

A Pockitude™ is a gratitude recorded in a pocket-sized journal. It’s choosing to focus on the better things, the things that remind you why it’s great to be alive. We all need consistent reminders of the good things, and writing them down as you see them is a great tool in your arsenal. The Pockitudes™ journal fits in your pockets and purses, so you can record your gratitudes as they come to you.

With a quick jot, you get a monumental shift on your outlook in life. We encourage you to write your gratitudes for just two weeks. See for yourself the benefits. See for yourself the change in your attitude. See for yourself how you will begin to discover the good in things, people, and places.

Join the happiness movement.

 

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A Pockitude™ is a gratitude recorded in a pocket-sized journal. It’s choosing to focus on the better things, the things that remind you why it’s great to be alive. See for yourself the change in your attitude, and how you will begin to discover the good in things, people, and places. With a quick jot, you get a shift in your attitude. 

Filtering by Tag: happiness

The Joy List

Frederic Terral

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What does joy feel like? The joy that grips and electrifies us from the inside, when all the right sensory conditions merge to create bliss, elatedness, even ecstasy. Joy is manifested by the purity of feeling—feeling freedom, weightlessness and love for what we are experiencing. Joy holds us in the arms of lightness and laughter, reminding us the reasons we want to be alive. Joy is a gift given to us by the miraculous existence of this breathing body built to feel joy and pleasure just as it’s built to feel sadness or pain. So how do we find joy when we need it the most, without addictive substances, without desperation or dependency on something that in the end doesn’t serve us? How do we make joy so accessible, it becomes part of our daily rituals? How about making a Joy List?

It’s almost too simple. Try it. Right now. Write a list of all the things that bring you joy (in your Pockitudes gratitude journal ;-). You can even categorize your list. Joy in the home, Joy outside of the home. Joy with friends, Joy with family. Joy that costs money. Joy that is free. Spontaneous Joy. Joy that needs to be planned ahead. Joy I need to experience!! Whatever!!

Off the top of my head, here is a short list of my current joys:

  1. Hiking in the woods alongside a creek or river, listening to nature without distraction

  2. Laughing and connecting with friends

  3. Moving my body to music, in dance class, or anywhere else

  4. Teaching Dance

  5. Celebrating birthdays

  6. Walking barefoot in soft grass

  7. Seeing wild animals/creatures in my backyard (like fireflies in the summer)

  8. Making my husband and/or children laugh

  9. Going to a music concert of one of my favorite groups

  10. Puppies and kittens

  11. Cooking together with the family

  12. Improv comedy shows

  13. Bali!! Haven’t been yet but it’s on the list!

Your list will change, and hopefully it will grow. Use this list as a go to on a rainy or sad day. Use this list to change your life and make joy a priority.

PS. A joy list = gratitude list :-). More joy = more gratitude.

FIN.
by Misa Terral

REMEMBER

Frederic Terral

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We are so imperfect, still just kids really, making mistakes which leave us scratching our heads thinking....haven’t we been here before? Somewhere along the line we were sold an idea that happiness can be measured in milestones, money, accomplishments and accolades. For authentic happiness, there is no such thing. Such things can bring entitlement, such things can bring expectation, harsh self judgement--and hence harsh judgement of others. Such things can give the illusion of control and such things can bring the word “deserve” into play.

And so, we have since crumpled up that idea knowing that we are promised nothing. We began to ask, what is our true purpose and work then? What makes us feel alive? We work hard, we try our best, we breathe in life and exhale experience. True, unfettered aliveness, laced with wildness in its most vibrant and ecstatic sense, cannot exist without the challenges of loss and setbacks.

From moment to moment, we seek grace, we honor intention, we live with love, knowing we are going to screw up again at any minute, only to score big the next. We do the best we can. We just have to remember, we all are doing the best we can. Pockitudes was born out of this need to remember. We forget so easily, we have limited memory, we have limited time.

We just have to remember to be kind. We just have to remember that relationships, nature, experiences, and the tiniest victories, serve to bring us closer to our truest, most soulful, grateful selves. Gratitude keeps us going. Gratitude keeps us remembering. Gratitude keeps us kind, patient, present. Gratitude keeps us doing the very best we can.

5 TellTale Signs of Inauthenticity

Frederic Terral

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Our practice of inauthenticity began when we were children. We learned from adults, teachers, parents to behave a certain way at certain times, many times despite how we truly feel, or else be punished and shamed. In adolescence, we did what we could to fit in and find belonging. We may have even done things we were certainly not proud of. Even now,  years and experiences later, we all shape-shift and deviate from our most authentic selves. Many of us may still not even know who our most authentic selves are, let alone recognize when we try so hard to be something we are not. Some lives seem so perfect on the outside, but are falling apart from within. In the age of social media, it is SO easy to be inauthentic, SO easy to put on a face that truly doesn't belong to us, and why? Mostly because we cannot accept our true selves, what our life is really like, and who we really are. 

Authenticity equates to the ability to be vulnerable, real, raw and open. Can we be authentic all the time? Maybe not, but we at least we can be mindful of when we aren't and why. I believe myself to be authentic, but I realize there are many opportunities when I give in to inauthenticity. There are patterns that creep up, usually driven by fear and insecurity, and one small decision to protect myself turns into a new mask. We have to learn one way or another through our mistakes, through our anger, inauthenticity and regrets. But this only works if we can recognize when we are being inauthentic. Then we can name it, and really see what’s causing us stress, and what's causing us to compromise our own values to be something we are not. 

5 Telltale Signs of Inauthenticity:

  1. Anger. Resentment. Irritability. Judgment of self or others. Are you carrying any of these? Does it exist beneath your skin while you put on a happy face wherever you go and tell people you are “fine”? Anger is a real emotion, worthy of our attention, worthy of our time. It could take a long time to dig at the true causes of our anger, or the true cause of why we judge ourselves or others so harshly, but acknowledging it is the first step towards authenticity. The next time someone asks you how you are doing? Tell them the truth. You don’t have to tell them the whole story, but be real about where you are.

  2. Resistance or Dread. Are you resistant to doing something, seeing someone, saying something. Recognize the resistance and ask why. Are you saying “yes” when you really mean “no?” What will happen if you say “no”? Being inauthentic means forcing ourselves to do things we don’t really want to do, not to be confused with doing things we know we have to do (like working or cleaning). However, if we look a little closer, resistance to going to a job we hate is another form of inauthenticity. We all have times when we do things as a means to an end, but are you being honest about it? Are you pretending you love what you do? You don’t need to love what you do to survive, as long as you own your authentic self. This also goes with relationships. Are you hanging on to one that you know is not healthy or good for you? Why?

  3. Needing validation. Inauthenticity can point to insecurity and lacking confidence (and vice versa). We utilize people-pleasing or “flexing” to be liked, needed, noticed, or to feel worthy. Are you obsessing on Facebook or Instagram, or any other social media about how many likes you are getting or not getting? Are you waiting for someone to text you, notice you, invite you? Do you do things because you have fear of missing out (FOMO)? Are you telling people what they want to hear, or telling little white lies about yourself? When we are feeling fully present and authentic, we just don’t need to do any of these things, and we don’t care about “likes” and what people think. It doesn't mean we can't post something we feel good about, but pay attention to your intention behind it. Are you posting to boost your ego, are you posting for attention, do you feel utterly upset or depressed when you don't get the likes you want? Attachment to the outcome is a good sign we might be compromising our authenticity for ego.

  4. Can’t make decisions. If you know who you are, making decisions is easier. Indecisiveness, constantly changing your mind for fear of making the wrong decision, asking everyone else what they think...these are potential signs of struggling with authenticity. If you are clear and aware of what you like or dislike, there won’t be much hesitation, even with the tough choices. Lacking the ability to make clear decisions is a sign of not trusting ourselves, and not trusting ourselves is a good sign of inauthenticity. If you feel indecisive, ask what the fear is. Are you compromising to please someone else? If you truly can’t make up your mind about something, take a deep breath, clear your mind, and listen for the clear choice.

  5. Inability to accept what is, complaining and numbing out. Are you a complainer? Perfectionist? Consistently disappointed and dissatisfied? Chances are you might be a control freak and have much anger (see #1). If we are in a constant state of dissatisfaction, if we are constantly complaining, we are not accepting how things are, and authentic gratitude is out of reach. If we have voices telling ourselves we aren’t good enough, thin enough, smart enough, fast enough, successful enough, rich enough, kind enough, grateful enough and we just aren’t enough enough enough, chances are, we are not being authentic to who we really are.

    This kind of personal and life dissatisfaction often reveals itself in escapism, numbing out, avoidance-- we eat too much, drink too much, spend too much, we use substances, TV, our smart phones, sex, whatever to distract and avoid the raw and the real of who, what and where we really are. We then judge ourselves for these things we do and the negative cycle continues – more anger, more dissatisfaction, more resentment, more judgement. 

Authentic happiness and gratitude come with authentic acceptance. Knowing we cannot fix everything, do everything, be everything and being truly okay with all of it, including loss, grief, death, this perhaps is our toughest challenge, one that we work on daily. The closer we are to truly knowing ourselves, the better we get in finding the tools and modalities that help us achieve authenticity, acceptance, and true happiness.

Exhale and the Life Preserver.

Frederic Terral

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I stopped telling my kids that all I want for them is to be happy. Happy is great, happy has been the long held standard for a satisfactory life. As long as we are happy, all is well. I call BS on that. I’ve been happy plenty of times, and I love it when I’m happy, but happy is fleeting, and like most wonderful things, aren’t meant to last. I want to teach my kids what to do when happy isn’t available, when things just suck and we are trying to survive a mess of a day. What I tell them is Exhale, and Thank you.

There are all kinds of breathing techniques to help anxiety, or anger, but for me, it’s the exhale I long for. The extended, exaggerated, vocal exhale that releases me. We do it subconsciously with sighs, a semi-muted expression of discomfort. Forget the sighs. Bring on the guttural flow of carbon dioxide. Exhale the nasty, exhale the yuck, exhale the sad madness of it all. And then, and here’s where it really counts-- say “thank you”. Thank you sun, thank you breath, thank you end of the day, thank you pillow, thank you stars, thank you sunset. Thank you for life lived another day. Thank you for reminding me that if I can make it through days without happy, I can make it through anything. Gratitude is the life preserver that keeps us above the water, keeps us moving, just long enough until happy circles back around again.

Discover the Three Keys of Gratitude to Unlock Your Happiest Life!: Jane Ransom at TEDxChennai

Frederic Terral

Jane Ransom helps people build great relationships-with themselves, their partners and the rest of the world. As a coach and speaker, she draws on the latest brain science, while using true stories to teach and to inspire. A professional hypnotist, Jane specializes in the subconscious mind, that hard-to-pin-down part of ourselves that guides our feelings, thoughts and behavior.

A Beginner’s Guide to Gratitude

Frederic Terral

Needlepoint pillows remind us to count our blessings, we gather around the table at Thanksgiving every year to give thanks for what we are grateful for, and since the late 1990s Oprah has been telling us we need to keep a gratitude journal. Gratitude is a concept we can all understand, but isn’t something that is always put into regular practice. Making the conscious effort to make gratitude a part of our daily existence will rewire the mind, to be more receptive to noticing, and savoring the moments of happiness that give us contentment in our lives.

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”
— Oprah Winfrey

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How and why to practice gratitude at work

Frederic Terral

According to a wide variety of research, practicing gratitude can make us happier and healthier. It can improve our sleep, self-esteem and overall well-being. It can also result in more people liking us, better relationships and more success at work.

So, why aren't we all doing it?

Because being grateful is not necessarily easy — and it does require practice. Plus, it can be particularly challenging to embrace gratitude when it comes to our jobs, co-workers, salary, commute or long-hours. So, how do we go about practicing gratitude it at work?

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The Benefits of Gratitude

Frederic Terral

Gratitude is an emotion expressing appreciation for what one has—as opposed to, for example, a consumer-driven emphasis on what one wants. Gratitude is getting a great deal of attention as a facet of positive psychology: Studies show that we can deliberately cultivate gratitude, and can increase our well-being and happiness by doing so. In addition, gratefulness—and especially expression of it to others—is associated with increased energy, optimism, and empathy.

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9 Easy Ways to Get More Grateful (Ellen Seidman, TIME)

Frederic Terral

Jessica Pettway for TIME

Jessica Pettway for TIME

I felt several flashes of gratitude today, and it wasn’t even Thanksgiving or Ben & Jerry’s Free Cone Day. First my husband, Dave, got me iced coffee without my asking. Then my 8-year-old presented me with a handmade Rainbow Loom bracelet. And my new comforter felt amazingly soft and luxe when I fell into bed at night. Ahh . . .

As I grow older, I’m getting more appreciative of the people and creature comforts that make me feel loved and contented. One study estimated that for every 10 years of life, gratitude increases by 5%. And that, the research suggests, is beneficial to our bodies and minds: People who are regularly grateful—who acknowledge the goodness in life and the sources of it—are generally healthier and happier.

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How Gratitude Changes You and Your Brain

Frederic Terral

Evan Kirby/Unsplash

Evan Kirby/Unsplash

With the rise of managed health care, which emphasizes cost-efficiency and brevity, mental health professionals have had to confront this burning question: How can they help clients derive the greatest possible benefit from treatment in the shortest amount of time?

Recent evidence suggests that a promising approach is to complement psychological counseling with additional activities that are not too taxing for clients but yield high results. In our own research, we have zeroed in on one such activity: the practice of gratitude. Indeed, many studies over the past decade have found that people who consciously count their blessings tend to be happier and less depressed.

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The 31 Benefits of Gratitude You Didn’t Know About: How Gratitude Can Change Your Life

Frederic Terral

Gratitude makes us happier.

A five-minute a day gratitude journal can increase your long-term well-being by more than 10 percent. That’s the same impact as doubling your income! How can a free five minute activity compare? Gratitude improves our health, relationships, emotions, personality, and career. Sure, having more money can be pretty awesome, but because of hedonic adaptation we quickly get used to it and stop having as much fun and happiness as we did at first.

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How Gratitude Motivates Us to Become Better People

Frederic Terral

Gratitude has become a hot topic in recent years. Celebrities from Oprah to James Taylor to Ariana Huffington have promoted an “attitude of gratitude,” and gratitude journals, hashtags, and challenges have become immensely popular. Much of this enthusiasm has been fueled by research linking gratitude to happinesshealth, and stronger relationships.

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How to practice gratitude

Frederic Terral

Gratitude, or appreciation for the good things that happen in life, is an essential part of building happiness. When you’re going through a tough time it can be hard to remember to be grateful for the good stuff, but there are a stack of benefits that can be gained from working gratitude into your everyday life. Find out more about ways to increase your gratitude and your awareness of things you can be grateful for.

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WHY IS GRATITUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS SO BENEFICIAL?

Frederic Terral

It's no secret that gratitude is good for us, whether we're on the giving or receiving end. Multiple research studies have confirmed that practicing thankfulness increases our life satisfaction and leads to strong relationships. It's not hard to understand why being thanked provides a boost since we all like to feel appreciated. But why is it helpful to be thankful, and what gratitude practices lead to the most benefit?

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